The 13th Warrior

What’s for dinner? You are.

Based on Michael Crichton’s page-turner Eaters of the Dead (and why didn’t they keep the title??), this largely-forgotten ’90s action thriller has got everything.

Antonio Banderas as a suave, sword-wielding poet capable of slayin’ them with word and deed.

A burly pack of hard-drinking, harder-fighting Vikings on a mythic quest.

And, oh yes, the aforementioned Eaters of the Dead, cannibalistic sorta-humans living deep in the mists from which no man returns unchanged.

The movie was a huge box office bomb, proving, once again, that there are a lot of stupid people out there.

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