The Art of Self Defense

Mr. Miyagi, he ain’t.

The self-satisfied sensei in this darkly funny film is a lot more of a weasel than the dude who taught Daniel-san, and a lot more likely to beat up his student.

Jesse Eisenberg first shows up at the dojo after getting roughed up by a roving motorcycle gang, then quickly becomes hooked on the mix of face-punching and tough-love self-help being peddled.

Before long, he’s in deep, his pet Dachshund whacked (and replaced by a German Shepherd).

How low is the student willing to go to become the master?

That is the question of the day.

Green Room

Fight for your right to party.

It’s punk rockers vs. Neo-Nazi’s in an unexpected death match, after a road-weary band accidentally witnesses a murder while playing at a very-questionable club in the middle of nowhere.

Our sainted Captain Picard himself, Sir Patrick Stewart, is the leader of the bad guys, while the late Anton Yelchin, also a Star Trek veteran, is the band’s bassist.

With a lot of the action confined to cramped spaces — primarily the room where band members barricade themselves — director Jeremy Saulnier does a great job of ramping up suspense (and the body count).

No encores tonight.